BeerBorg Beer Jokes...drink beer, tell joke

[Yankeedag]

FIT, you are a sick sick man. I like that in you.

[Yankeedag]

http://vitaminl.tv/video/590?ref=rcm

hope it works...

[FrozenInTime]

http://vitaminl.tv/video/590?ref=rcm

hope it works...

HOT DAMN!! I want that... er... whip!!

[rattlesnake]

YD..... how long did it take you to get the floors that clean?

[Yankeedag]

with the degreaser and water hose, about 4 hours

[John Sand]

I told her NOT to post that!
Hooonnnneeeeyyyy!

[FrozenInTime]

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged & walking slowly.

One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that."

The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart, just as we learned in class."

Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him, "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?"

The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell me what you two fine medical students think."

The first student said, "I think its Peltry Syndrome."

The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."

The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."

The old man said, "You thought - but you are wrong."

So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?"

The old man said, "I thought it was GAS - but I was wrong too!"

[FrozenInTime]

A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The girl was wearing a firefighter's helmet.

The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat. The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.

'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.

'Thanks,' the girl replied.

The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.

'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster. '

The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren.'

[FrozenInTime]

Just gotta share this country song about PBR. Watch it... it's pretty funny!!
(AND, not *pg* rated... hehehe)

[Yankeedag]

I'll have to show this to my son... he drinks that wizzwater

[Yankeedag]

A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work.
His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in. She says my
hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done,
I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! What
the hell did you bring him home for?"


"Because he's thinking of getting married."

[Rebel_B]

That's too real Dag!

[FrozenInTime]

An Arizona couple, both well into their 80's, go to a Sex Therapist's office.

The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?'

The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?'

The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse..'
He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.

The next week, the same couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.

This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.

Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'

The man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything. She's married; so we can't go to her house. I'm married; and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and best of all....


Medicare pays $43 of it.

[FrozenInTime]

Ole Olson is on his deathbed, knows the end is near, and is with his nurse, his wife, his daughter andhis two sons.

"So", he says to them, "My oldest son Swen, I want you to take the Minnetonka houses; daughter Lena, take the apartments over in Edina; son Rasmus, I want you to take the offices over on Hennepin; and Gunhild, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings downtown."

The nurse is just blown away by all this, and as Ole slips away, she says, "Mrs. Olson, your husband must have been such a hardworking man to have accumulated all this property."

Gunhild replies, "Property?...The idiot had a paper route!"

[FrozenInTime]

DOT has issued a travel warning due to snowfall and bad road conditions.


They suggest that anyone traveling in the current icy conditions should ensure they have the following:

Shovel
Blankets or sleeping bag
Extra clothing including hat and gloves
24 hours worth of food
De-Icer
Rock Salt
Flashlight with spare batteries
Road Flares or Reflective Triangles
Full gas Can
First Aid Kit
Booster cables




I looked like a fking idiot on the bus this morning